Why I Started a Blog
I think writing a little bit about myself and why I started a blog is fitting for my first post. I am married to my high school sweetheart, whom I adore, and I am a mama to two beautiful babes: Layla and Benjamin who are exactly two years and 3 days apart (yeah I know). I completed my undergraduate degree in Psychology and Health Studies as well as my Masters of Teaching at the University of Toronto in my mid twenties. Although I loved the work I did with my degrees, life happened and I ended up working with my husband building his business. Which I love, however, something was always missing, a place where I could be creative and express myself.
I am finally launching myself or better yet throwing myself into the work that I have been dreaming up since around 2011 (if Im being honest). A newly married twenty something gal ready to do something with all this pent-up creativity. But like I said, I was dreaming it up not actually doing anything about it. After what seemed like forever to make an actual decision (about 4 years later), I hired a web designer and started filming YouTube beauty videos, I was so nervous that all I could think of was how much I wanted to be the next Elle Fowler or Kandee Johnson (insert eye roll).
As everything was revving up on my end, life decided to get in the way yet again. Illness, infertility, and tons of medication type of “in the way.” Oh yeah, and a whole mother load of self doubt and insecurities that went along with all those experiences. If I were to close my eyes and go back to the beginning of this dream, the reason for wanting to start this in the first place, was to find a creative outlet in which I can totally be myself, I wanted to escape all the sadness, insecurities, and plain out awful things I had experienced or was experiencing at the time.
But, I let “me” get in the way, I let my self doubt and insecurities, specifically the way I look and feel about myself get the better of me. That little monster telling me that I am not good enough and that I am worthless, like who would ever listen or read what I have to say?
Thoughts I had consisted of but not limited to…
Maybe I’ll come off as too superficial?
Maybe I am not skinny or attractive enough?
Maybe I’m too old?
Maybe my spelling and grammar isn’t good enough?
Maybe they’ll laugh?
Maybe I’ll fail then people will laugh?
What if what I have to offer isn’t enough?
What if I fail because of all the above?
But then late last year I began to slowly change the narrative in my mind…
What if I SUCCEED? What if this is the perfect time to make things happen for myself? What if it’s great?
It’s about dang time.
I think its about time to invest in myself. Pursue the dreams I have dreamt up and make them become my reality. I have decided that it’s time to at least give myself the chance, the chance to at least try. Eight years from the time I began dreaming, I have become a rare disease survivor, infertility warrior, a Mother and a conqueror of self doubt. I am me, and am now ready to celebrate every part of my imperfect “me.” I have decided to share my story and every aspect of the things that make me happy, and the passions that I have developed in the times where the world was so dark around me.
I hope you stick around for some weekly inspiration from the things that I find absolutely fascinating. Here you will find content in beauty, style, home and everyday life experiences from an honest multifaceted everyday woman who deals with down to earth real day to day struggles, but with a little added sparkle and glam.
Thank you for taking the time to get to know a little more about me, I am looking forward to getting to know you too.